When does one moment become . . . the point of no return? The point beyond which one must continue on one’s current course of action because turning back is physically impossible, prohibitively expensive or dangerous?
This time it was my spouse. But it could have easily been the kids’ neurology appointment last week or even our first neurology appointment 10 years ago. That moment where you hear a word, for the first time, that gets your attention – stroke, autism, cancer, myopathy, diabetes, etc – right there frozen in time. The first diagnosis lingers, etched in your memory and can be relived each time a new diagnosis is mentioned. Recognize that moment when it occurs and seize it: the fearfulness, questions leading to more questions, and what ifs . . . ?
In the fantasy of the moment, you would be my spouse, accepting at face value the doctor’s words “REM without atonia” hastily written, on the back of a business card. Medical instructions are “follow up if you start having violence in sleep or acting out your dreams.” You hear the doctor’s diagnosis and explanation, follow his instructions and go on about your life without much concern. You feel that trusting the doctor is giving you enough information to make informed, educated decisions — after all, he is the doctor who went to medical school and did “the work”: waiting to see if another symptom develops; trusting one specialist with a partial viewpoint to see the whole picture; blindly accepting a “wait-and-see-what-happens-next” approach, risking prevention of further symptoms. Maybe you’ll have more frequent appointments and any follow-up questions answered in six months or so.
As a Thinker — one who has long since reached her own point of no return — I said, “What the h#@@? He mentions violence in sleep and no referral to neurology?”
The sleep doctor is aware of the kids’ medical issues, on a “need to know” basis. What else is he not telling us? Plenty, I discovered thanks to Dr. Google, Sleep Journals, PloS One and PubMed. I asked more precise questions of my spouse. More sleep study details emerged. More concern developed: Diagnosis is confirmed upon the presence of spikes on sleep study — indisputable. Diagnosis has been shown as a marker for pre-diagnosis of Parkinson’s disease. And all my spouse got was“follow-up if . . . ”? How is it acceptable for doctor or patient(!) to wait for the next symptom to show before action? It isn’t for me.
I approached the subject again several days later. His response, “But the doctor said not everyone who develops this goes onto have more diagnoses.” Truth. Our conversation turned, “Let’s look at the bigger picture of your immediate family history and extended family history of autoimmune diseases. Let’s consider how well ‘wait and see’ advice has worked out in our children’s past. Are you willing to risk your health, your future, our future?”
This is #parentsdothework in action. This is spouses doing the work. This is how you take charge of your health and change the paradigm.
Then I saw the story of Carolyn Schutte who was preparing for a trip to Africa when she was permanently disabled by brain damage due to the vaccines she received, to the point that she needs a hydration tube and specially prepared food, can’t walk and can only say yes and no. Why do caregivers like Schutte’s husband, Jim, see a “rare,” “anecdotal” incident and accept the money and outcome? Wouldn’t he rather prevent another’s wife, sister or child from experiencing this “rare,” “anecdotal” incident? His wife was not an undeveloped child. No one can say, “she was always like that; you just didn’t notice,” which is what people often say to the many thousands of parents who say this is what happened to their children after a round of vaccines. Perhaps it’s not so “rare” or “anecdotal” after all?
What about CDC and FDA not only approving things that can cause that kind of damage, but also recommending them to everyone regardless of immune system status? And the states who mandate those recommendations, assuming them to be not only benign but beneficial?
Ask yourself what is your tipping point — when is the damage too much? When it’s undeniable and too late? Or will you be someone who can see the big picture before it’s too late?
One moment, one diagnosis at a time – a point of no return. The point you choose a path of proactive healing rather than one of reactive acceptance.
Share your tipping point story.
~ Rogue Zebra
Hey, just a question, should I get my son vaccinated or not? I mean, I get that theres some bad stuff in it, but is it worth it? I’ve done some research and it seems that vaccines help a lot, but I’m not sure. Please help!
Steven, no one can — or should — make that decision for you. If you have not done enough research to feel comfortable with your decision, you need to do more. I would suggest breaking it down into little sections. Go vaccine by vaccine. Do you want your son to get the hepatitis B vaccine? Do all the research you can on that and make a decision. Do you want your son to have the flu vaccine? Do all the research you can, etc. I can tell you that many people get no vaccines and feel comfortable with that, but they had to do an enormous amount of research to get to that point.
Vaccines DO cut the number of acute infections, but it would be worth your while to ask yourself “at what cost?” Look around you. Everywhere you look you see the evidence of what a vaccine program on steroids will do. Do the children you see look well? Do they look like children looked when you were a child? If not, why not? Ask your friends whether their children have chronic illnesses like allergies, asthma, ADHD, OCD, ODD, sensory processing disorder. Ask them if they are on medications and how they expect to be on those medications? Then ask yourself what it is you want for your son and how you are going to achieve it.
Yes, Kevin, I did notice that the email address corresponded to you and not some guy named Steven. I’m sure you thought it was a clever test to see if you could get us to give advice on the subject, but you know what? ^ That was my real answer. We DON’T give medical advice. We give research advice. Everyone needs to make their own medical decisions for themselves and their families and they need to be comfortable with them.
Personally I would say not. The childhood diseases, meaning measles, mumps, rubella, chickenpox, and even pertussis (after five months old or so) are very rarely dangerous for healthy, well-nourished children and offer many benefits for the immune system. Babies should be breast fed until self-weaning, or at least for two years, and that offers good protection from meningitis, which is rare to start with. I’d say maybe the DT series after two years old. Polio not necessary at this time in the U.S. Forget about the criminal hep-B vaccine, which caused my baby’s autism. Forget about the flu vaccine too, dangerous and ineffective. The vaccines are MUCH more dangerous than the vaccine-preventable diseases. Read Aviva Jill Romm’s Vaccination for advice on caring for the VPDs at home.
“This is #parentsdothework in action. This is spouses doing the work. This is how you take charge of your health and change the paradigm.”
These lines especially resonate with me. When my son was three and a half years old he developed a sudden blinking motor tic. Bam, out of nowhere. It threw me for a serious loop and into intense research mode. The blinking also coincided with headaches, tummy aches, and a bit of foot pain. (followed by other symptoms)
Three days into this we made an appt. with the pediatrician to see what was going on.
In the meantime of waiting for the appt, he started having migrating joint pain, and urinary accidents, more headaches, neck pain, and anxiety.
I kept researching, staying up until 2 am for about six nights in a row (and for months after that). PANS reaction to a bacterial infection is what I found online that seemed to fit; infections including strep and also lyme disease could cause this.
At the pediatrician appt. he did bring up the strep idea. Kudos to him for knowing that. But, when I mentioned that I would like my son tested for lyme disease too, he nicely, (b/c he is actually a very nice man, just seriously uninformed) shook his head, and said that we could test for lyme if I wanted to, later at another appt., if symptoms persisted, but that he didn’t think it was lyme, b/c “lyme disease is very rare.”
I went home and continued to research, “parents do the work in action”, Dr. Google. Reading as much as I could, talking with other people online on forums, anything I could do.
All the while symptoms did persist and got worse. I knew from things I had learned online, that if lyme disease was going to ruled in or out, it would need to be done by a lyme literate dr., not the pediatrician.
Long story short my son had lyme disease. He is now 99% symptom free and doing really well a year later. If I had listened to the pediatrician my son would most likely have been misdiagnosed with several other illnesses and not treated properly for the infection he did have, and would have ended up in a terrible situation with a chronic illness, horrible symptoms enduring.
I know Dr.s aren’t gods and cannot know everything, but I do think some could know (be aware of) more than they do. The good ones are open to learning.
I thank God every day now for the internet, for people sharing stories and information, for being able to read scientific articles, for the wealth of information available to us all.
Thank you to all of you at thinkingmomrevolution.com too for the information and ideas you share. I know it’s not necessarily lyme disease you all are talking about, but I’ve learned tons from you all on many issues (and they overlap with others) and on the idea of being a thinking mom. Being a thinking mom is the most important thing.
Thank you!
Excellent work, Stacey! I think Lyme disease is often a contributor in the complicated health problems we are seeing today. Those sneaky buggers come in three different forms and can invade any kind of tissue. We need more info on the site about the connection between Lyme and all the other issues.
Thank you for sharing your story. Doctors are not gods, and they do not have all the answers. Some of them don’t even know the right questions to ask. We must all be our own health care advocates, and that includes looking beyond the pat answers and status quo. Blessings to you and your family!
Please look into chelation options. Metal exposure can be attributed to many health issues. I use Zeolite from time to time, which is a safe way to expel toxins, metals, radiation and viruses. I can’t say if it’s the answer for you, but it may help. After years of health issues, i started finding solutions online. Since doctors couldn’t find the causes, it was time for me to take my health into my hands. I think physicians have their purpose, just as i think some pharmaceuticals have their uses – but not for all issues. Best of luck to you and your continued search. <3
After several years of dealing with symptoms of fatigue, brain fog, irregular menstruation, and having doctor after doctor tell me it was all in my head and I must have anger issues with my dear husband, and lastly infertility that the doc said “he could tell it was genetic” but offered no more information, I finally took matters into my own hands and started researching and found a compassionate doctor. Over time, as I learned more, our only son’s issues worsened. I used my newfound skills to find help for him. I also found I kept being drawn to a particular book in the stores. After over a year of seeing it, I finally bought it and read. What was the book? “Environment of Harm”. When I got to the section that spoke about MTHFR, a light bulb went on. I remembered my old infertility testing – a genetic study that the comapssionate doc had done but said was “normal”. I was hetero for MTHFR C677T!! So we at least knew that my son had a good chance of the same. Turns out he is compound hetero for MTHFR. At that point I went full steam ahead into the biomed we had been dabbling with and have not looked back! I have now learned to trust my instincts and if I keep being drawn to something, I investigate further! We take nothing medical for granted.