You Might Be A Thinker IF…

The most common question the Thinking Moms get asked…almost daily…is “How do I join The Thinking Moms’ Revolution?”  Readers may not realize that we are incorporated and have a book on the way, but if you are reading our blog, if you’ve asked us this very question, chances are, you’re already a Thinker.  So, we might or might not have been drinking wine online together last night while plagiarizing and modifying Jeff Foxworthy’s signature phrase to our very own, “You might be a Thinker if…”  Here’s what we came up with.

You might be a Thinker if…

Yeast Cell

You know yeast is not just some awesome organism that makes bread rise.  Oh, how you know this.

You can decipher a slew of medical and diagnostic acronyms without a secret decoder ring.

You can hold an entire conversation with JUST acronyms using: ABA, ACE, ASD, AS, ADD, ADHD, CAPD, EI, EE, EOS, FTT, HFA, IEP, IFSP, NT, OT, OCD, ODD, PT, PDD, PDD-NOS, RDI, ST, SID, SPD, SN, SLP.

You make a random medical comment to another mom in passing and she asks you questions for 45 minutes.

You bring your family’s food with you when you go to parties.  You also bring it on a cruise and store it on ice in the bathtub.  For a week.

Your nighttime reading consists of stacks of medical studies other Thinkers have forwarded to you, and you can navigate PubMed better than your average paediatrician.

You arm yourself with the necessary tools before going to the paediatrician: VaxTruth printouts, alarming study summaries, and SafeMinds brochures to leave in the waiting room.  You *might* also steal the vaccine propaganda out of said waiting area and use it as kindling in your fireplace.  Not that we’ve done this.  You also might page through the magazines and pencil in the NVIC website next to every flu shot ad you see.

You move books like Raising a Vaccine-Free Child next to What to Expect When you’re Expecting at your local bookstore.

You clean your house with baking soda and vinegar.

You can smell a diaper full of Clostridia from a mile away.

You spend more money on organic food than you do on clothing.

You know the definition of the word “methylation” and can use it in a sentence.  You can also explain where your child is deficient in the methylation cycle.

Your local health food store calls you for tutorials on supplements.

Your teenager asks you not to diagnose her friends when they come to the house.  True story.

Your family vacation takes place at a conference.

Your car is full of Gardasil propaganda you swiped from your daughter’s middle school.  Not that we’ve done this either.

At least two thirds of your FB friends are autism parents, you love secret autism FB groups, and you know the members better than anyone else on your friends list.  You can list their childrens’ names, dx’s and interests even though you have not met most of them in person.

You’ve gone to a baby shower, stolen all the infant Tylenol and J&J products out of a basket and replaced them with California Baby and homeopathic remedies.


Gluten-free pancakes

You’ve figured out how to hide an entire square organic GFCFSF meal in a pancake.

You know that Mast Cells have nothing to do with sailboats or the weather.

You know that MTHFR can be used as a scientific term and a swear word.

Your favorite accessory is a tin-foil hat.  Kidding.  Sort-of.

You have ever sent supplements to a mom who couldn’t afford them.

You can argue mercury as a neurotoxin to a dentist until they roll over and scream “uncle!”

You have tested your dishes for lead.

You have toned arms from lifting your cast iron cookware.

You can analyze a stool sample better than Quest labs, and you have no problem talking shit.  Literally.

You never trust anything until you research it for yourself.

You don’t wait for someone to show you the path.

You don’t stop telling your story because even if it saves just one…

You know the truth will come out.

You THINK for yourself.

You never, ever, ever, ever give up hope.


We ask you, Thinkers, what would you add to this list?



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67 Responses to You Might Be A Thinker IF…

  1. Hi! I know this is kinda off topic however , I’d figured I’d
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  2. Melissa Bower says:

    I saw a reference to Mast cell while reading. Can anyone tell me how the Mast cell ties into Autism?

  3. Kelli says:

    I have been reading entries on this site for about 3 months. I really love them. This is the first comment for me and since I am not a writer,( more of just a reader) I’ll be brief. Thank you all for your writing. It’s nice to know there are others out there with many of the same feelings.

  4. Sofia says:

    This is another great article. I will be honest, I just found this website and I love the humor involved in your writing as well as the information! I am sure looking forward to a book 🙂

  5. Kati says:

    How about “graduated” from GF to GFCF to GFCFSFCF to SCD/GAPS… LOL!

  6. Chica Dee says:

    OMG, I soooooo needed to laugh! Using MTHFR as a swear word totally made me LOL! That’s the only way I can remember that acronym. Stoked I found out about this site -finally, a place where I feel at home!

  7. Jaime Unterthiner says:

    I would like to add WTF to the Acronym list, since that is the one that pops out of my mouth just when I think the yeast is under control, and it once again rears its ugly bastard head!

  8. Arwyn says:

    I would add opening a FB conversation about vaccines, facing TONS of hostile pro-vaccine parents and responding with facts, links to this and other blogs and managing to get the last calm, reasonable word.

    (I must put my disclaimer here that I DID tell them that I was knowledgeable on the topic and to not waste their time with the “everyone needs their shots” “herd immunity” canned replies. Comment at your own risk.)

    I doubt any of them took a moment to read any of the links I posted, but maybe I got one person to just THINK, not blindly TRUST what we are told is right.

    • lol, arwyn i empathize. someone recently posted info on my wall about vaccines helping after i posted a pic of a little boy’s awful reaction to a vaccine. she got blasted and notified that coming into the recovery community uneducated wasn’t safe. hey, i’m gonna tell it like it is.

  9. Hmm, sounds like you might be a Holistic Mom as well!!

  10. Someone goes to pass your child a banana, apple or grapes (since for all they can determine, those are the only things left to eat once you remove gluten, dairy, soy, dyes, sugars…..) and you practically knock it out of their hands and scream “That feeds YEAST!”. That leads to another 45 min convo on gut pathogens and their impact on the brain.

    A classmates parent says “I know your child is allergic to wheat so I got him the plain donut, he can have that, right?”

    Your children know to pass on the chemical hand sanitizers at the bouncy house bday parties and instead come straight over to mom for homemade “sanitizer” made with essential oils. They tell the teenager working the sanitizer pump that “those chemicals are bad for you….”

  11. sommer says:

    I feel like singing while holding hands with everyone. Lol 🙂 I don’t know how long this group has existed but I’m glad I’m aware now! Definitely in-step and ready to spread the word. 😉

  12. Autumn says:

    So awesome. Cracked me up! I didn’t get a 100% but at least 75%!

  13. Nancy says:

    Too add to the acronym list:

  14. Happy says:

    I love it. You guys kick ass.

  15. Buzz says:

    When you ask for digestive enzyemes and probiotics for your christmas present for your child…… xoxox

  16. Jennifer Power says:

    Can not WAIT for the book!

  17. Toni says:

    “please don’t diagnose my friends when they come over.”

    omg I’m dyin’!!!! bwahahaha

  18. Karren says:

    Joanna you have cracked me up with that one:)

  19. Joanna says:

    I’ve used this before, but I’m going to keep saying it until it actually happens to me- “your kid says ‘F you Mommy’ and you can barel choke out ‘Great sentence!’ through tears of joy.”

  20. Sugah says:

    Love it!!!

  21. Herbwifemama says:

    Ok, most of these make sense, but I don’t get the diaper full of Clostrida? As far as I could tell, that’s bacteria, and since poop is mostly bacteria… I don’t get it?

    • Carolyn M says:

      Clostridia filled poop has an extremely horrible smell. It is not much of an exaggeration to say that the smell can turn your stomach. In other words: once smelled, never forgotten.

  22. Rebecca Lee says:

    Bravo to all you heroic mothers!
    I coach the Andy Cutler protocol for mercury chelation.

  23. Janna Brendmoen says:

    Can spot a child stranger with autism from a mile away, and upon seeing one, make a B-line to talk with their parents.

    • Arwyn says:

      So true!!!

      I pick them out all the time and try to invite them over! Why be wacky at home? Come take a part in our wackiness!

  24. Diana Gonzales says:

    Burst into the snotty cry reading a TMR post! Dissolved “friendships” because they think your child(ren)’s illness is not all you say it is and they try to convince you you’re crazy about thinking your child is vaccine injured. You judge less and diagnose more…that screaming boy covering his ears at the grocery has sensory issues and is overwhelmed…poor baby.

  25. Maggie Mae says:

    LMAO at all of it! Every line rings true…

  26. Kelly S. says:

    Love it! May I add…..
    Left my local Autism Support FB page b/c they are insulted by the terms sick & recovery…(Which I posted regularly)
    Have converted God-knows-how-many kids to GFCF
    Get more joy from finding a great new supplement than a great new pair of shoes
    And yes…If I make one medical comment, moms do question me for about 45 minutes. It usually ends with “Why didn’t my ped tell me that?” And my answer..”They likely don’t know.”

  27. Blaze says:

    Text your friends pics of your kids’ poop to get their advice.
    Lose sleep because you are on the phone conferencing with other autism moms, even if you just got sleep back with the discovery of melatonin or some other intervention that brought sleep to your formerly sleepless kid.
    Cry when your kid picks up a fork, turns his head when you call him, or puts 2 words together for the first time. (things most Moms wouldn’t even notice)

  28. joy says:

    You can’t see or speak to a pregnant mom without talking Vaccine damage.
    You don’t trust anyone just telling you to do xyz, but you are willing to try anything you can research.

  29. PoppyTMR says: <3

  30. Marco says:

    You have had to redefine family and friends because of the vaccine dabate. Some gone, new ones added.

  31. Melinda says:

    must be a thinker …

  32. Cynthia says:

    Lol! LOVE IT!!!! 🙂

  33. BESkala says:

    I love this. Truly. I kinda wish I wrote it (or had the talent to write it). I relate to many, many things listed. And I am THRILLED that a TMR book is in the works. Rock on!

    • Goddess says:

      Add to the list then!!

      • BESkala says:

        – You don’t mind hearing the same YouTube video over and over and OVER again.
        – You flinch into a panic when you cannot find the remote control to “TURN OFF!” the Empire floors commercial that instantly wigs your kid out. You do out of habit this even when he is at school.
        – You can’t believe how many McNuggets your child once ate before you knew better.
        – You shake your head how you scoffed at the Early Intervention who diagnosed your child in a mere 45 minute visit. (“I’ll take your diagnosis to get services but you can kiss my *ss!) Now you can now pick kids out of crowds who have ASD.
        – You have gone to Staples to color photocopy, then laminate the covers of his favorite cds that must be carried around as woobies. (Only to find that the originals are preferred. Beyond tattered, but still preferred.)
        – You must inform the hostess at every birthday party to give you a five-minute warning before the cake comes out and “Happy Birthday” is sung. At that point you abandon the cooler of food that you brought from the table/corner seat you have, closest to the exit door, and ask a relative to text you when the coast is clear to come back in.
        – You spend years wondering if you should “go for child number two.” When you do, and you are in labor, you cry on the way to the hospital (still) worrying if you have done the very best thing or very worst thing for your first-born. (Fast-forward ten months: it was the *best* thing. 🙂 xoxo

    • Professor says:

      Love your list, and really glad it turned out to be the best thing. 🙂

      • BESkala says:

        Thank you. My daughter owes her life (and health) to her big brother and his sacrifices for the “herd.” She is my darling warrior-sibling-in-training. She lights up when she sees him in action, and my son immediately accepted her (even though he kinda thinks she has the cooties. 😉

  34. Robyn says:

    Great list, kindred Moms!

  35. Gemma says:

    I have a few suggestions for your acronyms… DIR, PTSD, OJT and CYA 🙂

  36. Cat Jameson says:

    Yes, yes, most certainly yes. Great post, Goddess!

  37. Sue Cranmer says:

    You never stop telling your story because you WILL save at least one!

  38. Betsey Shapiro says:

    Love this! Glad to know I’m not the only one who’s wanted to scribble “POISON” across all the vaccine ads in the mags in the doctor’s office. I am an adult with vaccine injuries – and will tell anyone who will listen to my story, though my OB/GYN fired me last week, when I told her that I settled my case with the Vaccine Court.

    Two days ago, a 3-year old in my town wandered into the nearby lagoon and drowned. I just read in the paper today that she was autistic. It broke my heart – when will this madness end?

    • Professor says:

      Okay, Betsey, I need to know why your OB/GYN fired you because you settled your case in vaccine court? What does that have to do with him/her in the first place?

  39. Holly B says:

    LOL Truth!

  40. stella taylor says:

    Please help. Just been reading your blog. I am a thinker. I need some help. I have two children with various levels of ADHD. I firmly believe they would have been autistic if I had vaccinated. The youngest still shows some interesting signs. Both talked late, have difficulties with school. I read Dr. Natasha Mcbrides work and have changed our diets for over a year now. But the problem seems to be me now. I managed to quit smoking about three months ago. But now I feel even worse. My thyroid condition seems to be worse… I am retaining water badly, very lethargic and extremely painful joints even with a paleo sort of diet. I refuse to go to the “doctor”. The nutritionists herbs arent helping, or I am allergic to something in them….. Im getting desperate. Any suggestions?

    Thankful for anything you can tell me

    Stella Taylor

    • Rebecca says:

      Have you visited the Stop the Thyroid Madness website? It’s an incredible resource for options a THINKER like you will love.

    • Goddess says:

      There are docs that are great with thyroid stuff…We cannot give medical advice but make sure you take care of yourself whatever you do…it is a serious condition. There is a FB page by two docs who also incorporate a lot of natural treatments called Women to Women who treat thyroid issues–they have a book out too. Might be something to look at.

    • Sugah says:

      I had similar problems. There are many things that have helped me in the past including (in no particular order) Andy Cutler chelation, classical homeopathy, CEASE homeopathy….the list is long. I am currently using organ drainage remedies prescribed by a homotoxicologist and a few other things. Sounds like your body needs to drain out the toxins. Do some research on homotoxicology and other detox methods. You can get better.

      Sending prayers for healing your way.


      • Professor says:

        Sugah is our resident thyroid expert, and, as I recall, she highly recommends getting the adrenals checked, too. Adrenal fatigue is a HUGE thing among parents of kids with special needs. If you get the adrenals under control, then the thyroid is easier to manage. Also, as far as the joints are concerned, fish oils make a huge difference in my daily life.

    • Kati says:

      The painful joints grabbed my attention… Especially on Paleo and not knowing exactly what you are eating. You might want to look into oxalates – there is a Trying_Low_Oxalates yahoo group that can help you out if you think this is a direction in which you need to put some time/research.

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