We are so excited to let you all know about a new blog series we are launching at TMR. Well, “excited” really isn’t the best word. We are sad, angry, disheartened, and frankly, distraught, that we even have to launch this series. It is not a series that we enjoy talking about, but rather it is a series that we have no choice but to talk about. Why? One of our missions is to help one more child become one less statistic in the fight against childhood chronic illness, a fight that is claiming more and more of our children’s lives each day, instead of less and less. What is this new series you ask?
A Thinking Moms’ Guide to Red Flags
What are Red Flags? They are the signs, symptoms, hints, and clues that all of us here at TMR have experienced with our own children. They are the things that scream out at us from every photograph, video, and memory of our own children, before, during and after their regressions and diagnoses. They are the things that we get queasy over when a friend posts a picture on Facebook of their child with the same “sign.” They are the things we observe or hear while shopping at our local grocery store as we see another mother struggle with her tantruming, screaming child in the cart. These flags are the symptoms that we overhear a group of friends talking about that they are concerned about (with their child) but are trying to be at peace with, since their pediatrician said it was “normal.” These red flags are the very things that will trigger PTSD in the mother of a child with regressive autism, a Thinking mother that has been there, done that. These flags can literally bring her to her knees, diving for cover at the sound, sight or smell of one of these red flags. These red flags are at the very heart and soul of our discussions with one another when Thinking Moms talk about prevention of chronic illness: because, without other “not-yet-Thinking Moms” realizing that these red flags are right in front of their noses, right now, in their children, healing cannot commence.
We know many of you Thinkers will say, “Well of course, this is elementary, remedial even. Everyone knows _________ is a warning sign of___________.” However, we are here to tell you that this is not the case. Each day new babies are born to mommas who do not know and who have no clue that A is a red flag for B, or even that the two are linked. It is our hope that you seasoned Thinkers will help us by using this series to spread the word.
Did a neighbor just post a pic of their infant with cheeks covered in eczema? Please share the Eczema Red Flag post with them.
Did you over hear a mom in the grocery store talking about her child’s “toddler diarrhea”? Then share that Red Flag post with her from your smart phone.
Were you at a playgroup today and saw a child banging his head? When the playgroup is over, first be a friend to that mother who may be at her wits’ end with her child’s “behavior.” Then send her the Head Banging Red Flag post and help her get help for her child.
We must all work together to stop this epidemic, but before we can do that, moms everywhere need to know that the epidemic is more than likely brewing within their own children, right beneath their noses. With estimates of up to 54% of children in the U.S. today having a chronic illness, the odds are not in that child’s favor. The sooner those moms act to intervene, and begin to think, the greater the chance that their child will not become another statistic of chronic childhood illness.
Keep an eye out for our first few Red Flag blog posts coming in February! And then SHARE! SHARE! SHARE!
~ Beaker
Hi! The article mentions chronic diarrhea but I cannot seem to find the red flag article on that? Do you have any information? My son is 2.5 with chronic diarrhea. Thanks!
Was it TMR who compiled a rather lengthy list…in one document…of all these red flags? I am looking for that document for a friend. Thanks.
We didn’t do it in one document. It was a series: https://www.thinkingmomsrevolution.com/category/red-flags
Also the children still struggling to speak at age 3 and beyond.
This will become a great place for any Mum to come and discover and learn more about their children. It will also become a haven for those who need to speak to someone whose been there before. Thank you. Kate in Australia
An idea I had was to design an app….a vaccine app. Superficially it would remind parents of when the shots were due…obviously marketed toward vaccinating parents, with a simple alert. Connected to the app would be a simple health tracker…a screen would come up with a selection of buttons on the child’s health status….eg, today my child is…energetic and lively….a bit subdued….has a skin outbreak…has diarrhoea…is screaming….has fever etc….the parent pushes the relevant buttons. After a few vaccinations, the parent can observe the patterns over time, to have undeniable connection between the vaccine and any deterioration. It would be a useful tool to show their Dr…..Skeptics may embrace it to prove there is no ill effect from vaccines, but wake up when they see that their child has a fever and an outbreak of eczema 2 weeks after every shot for example….. those on the edge who vaccinate but have suspicions can use it too.
Bless you “thinking moms” for doing this! Awesome idea 🙂
I don’t know. I know this idea comes from lots of good intent. You sound like great folks. But I think this is a breaking-up-friendships nightmare, honestly. Young, new mamas don’t want people butting in. They have to find things out in their own way. I have learned that the hard way. For instance, once I messaged a sister-in-law privately and told her I was worried about about a tic her daughter was having (which turned out to be nothing) and she was devastated and angry. And I will say when I was a young, new mama, having someone send me something like this would have crushed me. I am not sure it would have hastened me finding solutions. I would have been so embarrassed or worried, I would have dug into my privacy hole even deeper… I could only hear it from certain people and even they had to repeatedly go in with kid gloves… I am a long time autism mama so this is why I am saying all this. Lots of experience. BTW, I debated saying this “publicly” but figure if you are upset/embarrassed about it, it might give you some glimpse into how moms might feel when they receive “red flags.”
It’s an excellent consideration, Mary, and one everyone should think about before they send on one of the red flag pieces. One of the things we would like to do, though, is help people head off problems. If those new parents are aware of just how big a percentage of children are chronically ill today (up to 54%), it’s possible they will be eager to hear how they can head off long-term problems. We can only hope that we reach a number of them.
Well, I hope that people report honestly when it has been helpful and when it hasn’t so you can determine if this idea truly does good. Please everyone, do be considerate of people’s feelings and how a particular person will best be able to “take in” difficult information. Imagine how you would feel receiving a red flag text message on your iPhone from an acquaintance about your child’s hyperactivity? Or a neighbor coming over with a printed out red flag document about eczema — now you are worried they were staring at your child’s skin. Most people are more aware than they seem — and everyone can Google what they need. I won’t write again. Thank you for printing my concerns. That is very open of you.
Mary, I respect your feelings. When I was a young new mother ,not so young in my 30’s, I welcomed advice and would seek advice from the older experienced mom’s. I’m betting some of those mamma’s wished someone would have spoken up sooner before further damage was done. A well meaning friend/relative Can send out a red flag with words like,,, I thought you might be interested in this peice I just read. LET them Think then! A good book/movie/restaurant/recipe, etc. you share with friends And strangers… why not something that could potentially help their child?
I need that headbanging one now, and even knee banging….idk what is going on with him. I am excited about the series though 😀
This is awesome!! I have been looking for something like this!!! I am so thankful for all you do!!
CONGRATULATIONS! This is a FANTASTIC idea!
Fabulous idea. Will be so helpful for so many. I’m continually inspired by this group. Thank you.